The Bathrooms -- Week 6

I debated on writing a post this week, as it was a pretty uneventful week.  Besides enjoying an "American" day yesterday--going to see Men in Black 3 (great movie by the way), walking around a mall and then eating nachos and a hamburger (made w/ ground beef) at Chili's, the only thing that really struck me this week was so random, that I didn't even think it warranted a post--bathrooms in India.  But, since I was obviously moved enough to actually take pictures, I figured I'd share them and my thoughts...

Bathrooms
I realize that I've only visited large cities in India (Delhi, Bangalore and Hyderabad) so far, but one of things I was told to be aware of was that the bathrooms could be a bit of a shock to someone from the states.  I was told that there were holes in the ground and if you needed to go #2, you better have strong legs and the ability to remain in a squatting position as long as need be.  In fact, I got some advice from a couple friends this past week (thanks Ken and Bennett) that I should start doing wall sits and squats, to build up those muscles, and the ability to remain in that position without feeling like you were going to pass out.  I'm sure once I start traveling to more rural areas in India, I'll find out what it will be like hover over a hole and say "bomb's away"!  But until then, I can honestly say that I'm really enjoying the bathrooms I've 'occupied':

 

I've seen these signs in quite a few bathrooms--simple concept, but what a great idea for the states to ensure that if someone finds shit on floor, they may actually contact someone to have it cleaned up!

 

This is pretty typical to what I've found in all 3 cities, either in restaurants, the offices or bars.  I know you've all shared this following thought, or something similar, on the standard stalls in the states where the partitions don't go all the way to ground and there's sometimes a big gap in the door.  Here's the scenario...you're out at a restaurant or at work, and you have to use the bathroom, so you select the cleanest stall and do your business.  The whole time you're hoping that someone else doesn't walk in the bathroom and sit in the stall right next to you because you have no interest in seeing another set of feet dangling there, or worse yet, hear any sounds come from that stall.  It's normal to want to have privacy when you're doing your 'business' and that is why I'm loving the bathrooms I've experienced so far.

 

And although it's kind of tough to make out this photo, if you look closely, you'll see that the figure on this bathroom door is actually an alien.  I thought that was the coolest thing I'd seen and am kicking myself to not walk around the corner to see what the door to women's room looked like!

That's all I got this week...bathrooms!

Deep-ak Thought's by Keith -

- There's a reason they call it a "courtesy flush" folks...be considerate of your stall neighbors

The B's -- Week 5

This was the first week that I really felt like things geled...and the funny thing was that I wasn't even in Hyderabad.  I was in Bangalore this week for work meetings and our leadership team's offsite.  Bangalore is an amazing city and it felt very much like "home" for some reason. It was also a really energizing week work wise for me, which felt great.

This week's blog, which I titled "The B's", is going to primarily be a picture blog.

Birthday -
Happy Birthday to my baby sis -- Natalie...hope you had a great bday and good first week back to the adult world ;-).  Love ya!

Bangalore -
Bangalore is known as the "Garden City" in India and there was definitely lots of green, considering it's a population of 8 million people!

 This was the view from my hotel...and that stadium is a cricket staidum.

 The view from the top of the hotel--give you an idea for how close things are together.

Bikes & Buses -
I mentioned in my 1st blog how amazed I was, and still am, at how folks get around here in India.  Not so much the means of transportation, but the sheer volume on the street and so blatently obvious safety issues...

 This is how women ride--I keep thinking their dress (Sari) is going to get caught in the wheel.

It's tough to see inside the bus, but let's just say that none of these folks would complain about a New York subway being crowded.

I always think about transporting a whole room on the front of a motorcycle!

Yeah, looks real safe...and love how the dad is wearing the helmet.

 So it doesn't start w/ a "B", but this is a very popular form of transportation in India--it's called an auto rickshaw (in Thailand a Tuk-tuk)

THE BELL -

Those of you who know me well enough, you know that Taco Bell is my favorite restaurant (I know--sad) and prior to moving to India, one of my requirements on where I lived was that there was a Taco Bell within 5 miles of my place.  And places I was considering to live that were within walking distance to a TB earned bonus points.  Well, I was worried that I would go into withdrawl coming over to India, but you can imagine how happy I was when I heard that there are actually a couple Taco Bells in Bangalore, which may have had some influence into why I loved the city so much. It was by far the coolest Taco Bell I've ever been to--the interior and and style was all very modern and unique.

I took two of my co-workers (Mamta & Zubin) to Taco Bell for dinner one night. I was a little worried it wouldn't live up to all the hype I had given it, but they were both very happy...I still couldn't believe that Mamta had never eaten at a TB!

 The menu wasn't too different, but instead of beef, they had ground chicken--you couldn't tell the difference...probably because they don't really use real meat anyway.

I did try to talk them into opening a Taco Bell in Hyderabad and even offered to be a regular.

Deep-ak Thoughts by Keith -

- There's a saying "Home is where the heart is."  Well, I'd add on to that and amend the saying-- "Home is where the heart is...and where there's a Taco Bell close by."

- One man's bike is another man's moving van.

- Helmets for kids?? They're resiliant and have hard heads!

Mother's Day -- Week 4

Happy Mother's Day Mom!  And to all the other mother's who happen to read this--hope you all had a  great mother's day.  Love you and miss you mom! (Below pic was of me and my mom when my folks came out to visit me in Seattle for Mother's Day 3 yrs ago)

This week's blog is going to be a shorty--pretty uneventful week for me in Hyderabad, which was kind of nice for a change...I guess that means that I'm settling in and hopefully most of the crazy bat shit stuff is over.  BUT, speaking of bats...

BATS in Hyderabad--
So I have this little ritual that I like to do after work when I get back to the hotel.  I come up to my room, change into my bathing suit and head down to the pool for a little swim and a King Fisher beer. There usually isn't anyone else down there, so I have the whole pool to myself and the bartender (Ramesh) that works the pool bar knows me by name know and we chat for a bit and then after my swim I read from my Kindle for a bit before I head back in for dinner. 

Well this past Wednesday was no different...except as I was getting out of the pool and walking toward my chair w/ beer in hand, this thing flies out of nowhere and comes within inches of my head. Without thinking, I throw my arms up and I might've let out a little scream followed by "What the F*#% was that??".  And then quickly followed by, "oh shit! I dropped my beer Ramesh".  By this time there were a couple other staff members out there and all were just staring at me like I was crazy.  I don't know if they were in shock by what came out of my mouth, or the fact that I freaked out over a bat...yes, it was a bat, but not just one, there were several that were flying around.  I guess it was normal because no one else seemed to be surprised to see them. Anyway, after I help them pick up the broken bottle and Ramesh brings me another one, I go sit on my chair, but I feel like these bats are just swooping in and out and coming really close to hitting me.  So I decide it's time to go inside, but I don't just get up and start walking inside, oh no, I start humming and making strange sounds because my limited knowledge of bats reminds me that they're blind and can only sense by their hearing.  So, me trying to think all logically, I start humming and making sounds so that they don't come near me and will hopefully keep their distance.  It works to keep the bats away, but doesn't help with the staff who are watching me and thinking I've literally lost my mind.  The next day at the pool I explain to Ramesh what I was doing and he just laughed at me. 

Ping Pong -- their 2nd pasttime after cricket
I've noticed how big cricket is here in India by the fact that instead of softball or football fields on Microsoft's campus, there are cricket fields.  In addition, you can find a cricket match on tv at almost any time of the day/night.  But what I was surprised about was how gung-ho the Indians at Microsoft are about ping-pong.  The picture below is of a ping-pong table that is just below my office -- I walk out of my office and look over the railing to see this ping-pong table.  Well, I can tell you that there is rarely a time in the day that there aren't people playing.  And when I say playing, I mean they're really playing--sweating, running, having heated arguments, etc.  Sometimes I find myself drawn to just watch from my perch about them and laugh at how seriously they're taking this game that I used to play with my siblings and parents in the shed of our house in Rome, NY.  And how over the years the use of that ping pong table changed from playing ping pong to beer pong.  Part of me wants to teach the Indians about beer pong, but I'm worried they would think using the table for that purpose would be almost sacreligous ;-). 



Sorry folks, no "Deep-ak thoughts this week"...just wishing all the mom's a happy mother's day!  Next week I'll be traveling to Bangalore...and you know what's in Bangalore?? Two Taco Bells!!! I'm so excited ;-).



Happy Cinco de Mayo from India -- Week 3

Long week this week...and if I thought my experience last week ordering pizza was a test in patience, I was mistaken!

First off, want to wish my nephew (and godchild) a happy birthday today.  I think one of the things I'm going to find most difficult in being over here is that I can't celebrate those big days with family and friends...but doesn't mean I'm not thinking of them.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY DANE!! Nat, give him a hug and kiss for me.

My week in a nutshell...
I.  My week started with a 2-day trip to Delhi to visit our offices in Gurgaon on Mon & Tues.  Ok, maybe it's been a while since I've had to fly coach (I know...spoiled), but I seem to remember a bit more leg room.  Or maybe b/c there are a lot of short people in India, that all the Indian airlines figured they could get by w/ less leg space.  Regardless, my knees were up by chin, or that's how it felt, and although everyone else seemed to be wearing layers of clothers, I was wearing shorts and still had sweat dripping down my leg--you know, starting right on the back side of the knee and running down your calf (I know everyone reading this knows what i'm talking about). 

Of course flying within India for the first time there has to be a story--well, besides the limited leg room and plane hotter than a sauna.  Here it is--you go through security in an Indian airport and follow pretty much the same process as you would in the states, BUT something that I just don't understand is that every piece of carry-on luggage you bring on board needs to have a tag from the airline attached AND if that's not enough, the tag needs to be stamped at security after it goes on the belt and through the x-ray machine.  I learned this the hard way this week when I got to the gate and was boarding the plane and as I was giving my ticket to the gate agent, a security guard wouldn't let me through b/c I didn't have my bag tag stamped.  I thought I was going to have to run all the way back to security, but instead I flipped out (probably b/c it was 5:30am on a Monday morning and I would've rather been in bed still).  I went on and on about how that was quite possibly the stupidest rule I'd ever heard of and I obviuosly had to have my bag scanned and inspected at security, so what is the point to get a damn stamp?? After about 10 minutes arguing w/ the security guard, a gate agent supervisor came and ended up escorting me onto the plane and just informed me to be sure I followed procedure next time.  To which I replied, "thanks for the escort...and I'd be happy to follow procedure if someone informed me of proper procedures, or had it posted somewhere."

Made it to Delhi and spent a couple days in meetings and being introduced to various peeps.  I didn't get to see much of the city, so not much to share on this trip.  I did have the best Chicken Pad Thai I've ever had at a restaurant there. Made it back to Hyderabad with no problems...and I made sure to have my tag on my carry on luggage stamped at security.

II.  On Wednesday I signed a lease for an apartment and am scheduled to move in on June 1st. I feel that I really lucked out--both with the location (very close to the office) and with the apartment/furnishings.  It was by far the nicest of all the apartments I looked at.  I was looking to rent a fully furnished apartment, and although there were other nice places, the furnishings ranged from a "Golden Girls" to "Sanford and Son" feel.  I'll be sure to get pics posted once I move in.  Oh, almost forgot to mention--it's a 2 bedroom apartment w/ a king size bed in the guest room...just in case anyone wants to visit ;-).

III. Thursday I saw The Avengers--awesome flick and hoping that they make another one.  I do have to give it up for the theaters here in Hyderabad.  I've been to 2 different theaters and they both are nicer than the theaters in the states.

Things that have caught my attention:
I'm not sure if it's because I'm in a foreign country, or maybe b/c I have more free time on my hands, but whatever the reason, I'm noticing more things.  Like...
1) When there are limited tv channels you can watch, and you don't have Tivo, you are stuck watching the same commercials over and over and over again.  Just to give you an idea of the quality of the commercials--check out this Airtel commercial, which is quite possibly the cheesiest commercial I've ever seen...and it's on almost every other set.  Pay particular attention to the kid in the t-shirt: http://youtu.be/p4AwJ9A29y8

2) I think I've solved the great mystery of why the Indian population has such a large number of the old, and perhaps why they live so long...it's because they take their time doing EVERYTHING, and don't stress about anything.  There is no such thing as a quick in-and-out in India...even if you think that by going to a store in the middle of the day you'll miss the crowds--oh no, there's always people...everywhere and all the time.  And "fast food", well, forget about it!  On a side note, I did have my first McDonald experience in the Delhi airport, and enjoyed a 'Chicken Marajara-Mac'

3) And lastly, check out this "Pool Rules" sign that is located next to the hot tub in the men's locker room at the Westin...

Anything on this sign seem a bit strange??  Not sure about you, but after reading rules 4, 5 and 6, I'm not particularly interested in stepping foot in the hot tub! And although it's tough to make out, rule #5 states "Spitting, spouting of water or blowing your nose is strictly prohibited." That's too bad because I always have an urge to spit and blow my nose as soon as I get into a hot tub.  Oh, and another one that I found amusing--"Do not use alone."  What am I supposed to do?  Go up to someone and say, "Excuse me, I'd like to use the hot tub...could you please come in with me?"

Deep-ka Thoughts by Keith
- Patience is a virtue...but waiting for things really sucks!
- I now understand where the phrase "rules are meant to be broken" comes from...some rules, or processes, make absolutely no sense.  (Oh, forgot to mention that when you fly in India, they check your ticket at least 3 times between showing it to the gate agent and your seat.)

Have a good week all...and happy cinco de mayo and happy birthday Dane!

Over the jet lag... Week 2

I was so happy to see how many of you read my 1st blog, and even happier to hear that it didn't bore anyone to death ;-).

Just wrapping up my 2nd week here in India and took me nearly a week to get over my jet lag and feeling like I'm settling in.  It was an interesting week and I thought about how to best share it with you...so decided to try to categorize:

A test in patience...
When I visited India last August, I ordered pizza (from Domino's) and encountered some issues when I asked for a pizza with just mushrooms.  I was told that they didn't have just mushroom pizza, so I think asked what types of pizzas they did have.  The first one they mentioned was a pepperoni & mushroom pizza--yeah, I thought the same thing and was about to ask "how about a pepperoni/mushroom pizza w/o the pepperoni?", but I refrained and ordered the pizza as is.  Well, fast forward to this past week.   I asked the hotel for a pizza place recommendation, and they give me the number for Pizza Hut ;-). Well, I didn't think my first pizza experience in India could be topped, BUT I was wrong.  I called Pizza Hut and it took me 20 minutes to order a plain cheese pizza!  Not because they couldn't understand my order, but because 1) it took two people to understand my name--I didn't know "Keith" was such a difficult name, and 2) when I told them I was staying at the Westin, they proceeded to ask me a hundred questions about landmarks around the Westin--keep in mind that I gave them the address and even asked if they delivered to the Westin, which they answered "yes, no problem sir".  After I got off the phone, 15 minutes later the driver calls and starts asking me all these questions, which I couldn't understand and I think we're done--not because he says "bye", but b/c he just hangs up.  Then a minute later, another person from Pizza Hut calls.  For the life of me, I have no idea what they were asking...and then this one hangs up and a minute later someone from the hotel staff is at my door w/ my pizza.  I think I'll be picking up my pizza from here on out.

Addictions...
Since being out here, I've definitely gotten hooked on a couple things: Fanta Orange pop and Naan.  I could quite possibly live on both of them the rest of my time here.  The Fanta has saved me a couple times this week while trying a new food and finding out it was way too spicy for me.  And today I was eating some naan and thought "I need to bring some of this to the President of Taco Bell--I could only imagine the wonderful things they could do with it."

 

I'm also really taking a liking to this dish called Dal Makhani, which is black lentils simmered with tomato and butter--it doesn't look too appealing, but it's delicious.

I also have gotten hooked on this show called "I Shouldn't Be Alive", which is on the Discovery channel and is about individuals who've encountered near death situations, but have lived to talk about it.  I know, probably not the cheeriest of shows, but it's more addictive than watching a weekend marathon of "Intervention".





Firsts...

I also experienced a couple firsts this past week. 

- For those of you who know me, you know it was just a matter of time before the my Costco size supply of Immodium came in handy.  Well, I guess there's even a term for it called "Delhi belly", even though I'm in Hyderabad.  Luckily it was just a 24hr thing, but I won't got into those details, but referring to my blog last week--those baby wipes came in handy.  Don't worry, no pictures to share with you on this experience.

- I encountered my first "road cow" the other day. The driving/streets are CRAZY with walkers, bikers, Tuk-tuk's, cars, tractors, you name it and it's on the roads...and there doesn't seem to be any method or pattern to the madness, BUT a cow walking down the street, well everyone gets out of the way.  It was pretty hilarious to witness, and all I could think about was a steak ;-).

- I also went apartment hunting on Saturday and had prepared myself to keep an open mind.  I was pleasantly surprised by the options I saw.  I had informed the relocation team that I would be fine with a 1 bedroom apt., but they said it is very rare to have 1 bedroom apts. in India--most were 2 or 3 bedrooms b/c the whole family lived there, including grandparents.  I looked at about 10-11 apartments and selected my top 3 choices and am waiting to hear back on next steps.  They were all in gated communities, which I found is pretty typical, and my only ask was that there was a swimming pool and a western style toilet in the apartment.  Here are a couple pictures, but I'll include more when I decide on one.

 

 

Work...
I didn't quite know how to categorize this story, but I think it's the funniest thing I've heard/witnessed since I've been out here.  We have a guy who works in our office...he's simply called the "office boy".  I even asked a co-worker what I should call him and they said, "you can just call him office boy"--REALLY?  And the first thought that popped into my head was Chris Farley (may he RIP) playing in a movie called "Office Boy--The Indian Dream".  He comes to my office every morning to ask if I need anything and takes my water bottle and fills it up.  I realize this doesn't sound very funny, and is probably very normal to people in the offices here, but I can't help but think how wrong it is to just call someone "office boy".  And yes, I'll get a picture of him and post it in a future blog, so keep your eyes peeled for the next mention of the office boy.

Deep-ka Thoughts by Keith...
- When ordering pizza in a foreign country, tell your name is Tom--it's easy to understand.
- Cow...one man's dinner, another man's deity.
- A wise and very true saying-- "what goes in, must come out." (Could be the tag line for the 'delhi belly')

Until next post...take care and thinking of you all!
Keith

My first week in India...man it's HOT!! -- Week 1

For those of you who don't know the story, I moved to Hyderabad, India a week ago on an 18 month international assignment for work. I had only been to India/Hyderabad once, and that was back in August to check the city/office out. And although India probably wouldn't have been my top choice for an international assignment, I figured it would be an adventure and a great opportunity to work/travel in a part of the world I wasn't familiar with at all. Yes, it was very tough to leave family and friends from the states--especially my dog Chewy...

But 18 months will fly by and I'll be back in the states before you know it--at least that's what I told myself to work up the courage to head to live in a foreign land on my own, with very little knowledge of what lies ahead.

SO, the reason for this blog...I was posting updates on Facebook and chatting with friends/family via email and on Skype ('keith.auer' is my Skype name by the way--add me as contact), and thought that it'd be easier to create a blog to share updates, funny stories, bizarre thoughts and probably LOTS of inappropriate comments (i.e. two days ago I notied that really smelled like b.o., but it was a different b.o. than I had in the states--it was almost like my b.o. took on the scent of India if that's possible).  I also wanted to share photos of my time/experiences, especially for those who aren't on Facebook (you know who you are).

This is my first blog, so I have no idea what people find interesting, but definitely open to your thoughts/comments.  Even if no one reads my blog, I figure it will be cool to look back at it down the road to remind me of this experience...but I do hope people will read it ;-).

WEEK 1:

I arrived in Hyderabad last Saturday, April 14th @ 3am...probably not the best time to arrive in a city/country you know little about.  It all worked out and after a very grueling flight in business class on Emirates (Seattle to Dubai = 14 hrs., Dubai to Hyderabad = 3.5 hrs)...

I was expecting to have some issues at the airport with either my luggage (8 bags), finding my driver, customs or melting before I left the airport, BUT no big issues at the airport, which was a great way to start off the move.  Unfortunately the place they had arranged for me to live temporarily was was another story.  The airport was about a 20 min drive to my place and as we started to get closer, I was expecting to see the hotel, or at least some form of life around it, but when he turned down this dirt road, I thought he was going to throw me out and take off w/ all my stuff... At the end of this dirt road was the glamorous Mandava Suites (not).  The room was actually a lot nicer than the outside/surroundings, and the staff was super friendly, so I figured I could "rough" it until I found an apt. of my own.  Of course it was 3:30 in the morning and dark as hell, so I had no idea what was around, so I decided I'd unpack and before I knew it, the sun was coming up and this was my view from my back window/porch...

Yes, that's a little tent city in my backyard and the couple that lives in the one closest to my room were brushing their teeth and going to the bathroom when I looked out--"MORNING" I said ;-). 

It was all good--I was in a new country and keeping an open mind, but I did have my limit, and on the 4th night of being woken up at 2:30am by a pack of wild dogs just outside my window, I reached that limit.  Seriously, I think that couple might have been running some secret Hyderabad dog fighting ring in that area.  Regardless, they moved me to The Westin...

I know some of you are probably thinking "spoiled American traveler", well, I thought the same thing and then I walked into my suite and said "who the f*#% cares...this rocks!"  So I'm slumming it here at the Westin--and yes, that's a swim up bar in the pool! 

Work is going great and as I mentioned on Facebook, I always get really nervous on 1st days (school, work, dates, etc.), so I couldn't have been happier that my team took me out to lunch and then surprised me a 'Welcome to India' cake.  I'm going to learn a lot from this career opportunity...and will hopefully leave the team/organization in a better place than when I arrived.

This blog is starting to drag, so going to wrap up, and don't worry, not all my posts will be this long or dry, but wanted to set the context.  And I figure that by starting out w/ a really sucky post, it can only improve from there!  A couple more pics--tonight (Sat.) I went out to my first authentic Indian restaurant with some new friends I met.  The place is called Sholay, which is supposedly this VERY famous Bollywood film that ran in theaters for 5 straight years...which is crazy.  Needless to say, I'll be renting that to see how a movie can last 5 yrs in the theaters.

I was thinking of a way I can end all my posts and this is what I came up with...

DEEPak THOUGHTS BY KEITH--

• Best thing I brought with me...baby wipes--you'd think for a country whose food is probably going to make you shit buckets, they'd have some quality toilet paper!
• Whoever created bobble heads must've visited India and got the inspiration
• I will never lose my temper again while driving in the states and passing an Indian driver going to slow--I'll just be happy if he's actually staying within the lines on the road.
• And lastly, any of you who were horrified at Michael Jackson holding his baby over a railing should probably not come to India b/c you would freak seeing how kids are transported on motorbikes here--no kidding, the other day I saw 5 people on 1 bike...and no, there weren't any sidecars!

Until next time..."Stay Sunny Hyderabad"!!  Miss you all!

Keith